Notes on Budapest

i

Budapest has the most adorable trams. They are tiny and electric and painted light mustard. Inside there are little leather straps that make the journey feel like riding a living antique. They gleam in the sun and travel round the city radiating happiness and contentment. They could have changed the trams to something more modern, with less charm but which snake noiselessly along the tracks. Instead Budapest maintains a mark of its past to show off municipal pride.

ii

All the ingredients of ‘cool’ are here: good coffee, brunch places, piercings, tattoos, mdma. If the staff didn’t speak Hungarian it would be difficult to tell where in the world you are. You could be in Brooklyn, or Berlin. Whatever distinctive about Budapest is seemingly slipping away.

But that’s just because you’re not looking in the right places. The central market sells nothing but Hungarian food, and it’s not hard to find restaurants that only serve Hungarian food, and bars that only serve Hungarian beer. There’s still the imagined cool dark places where how people once lived preserved. It’s not hard to find a quiet garden to read in, even in the middle of town.

iii

You get a sense of the place being cosmopolitan, being on the up.

iv

Hungary is the only place in Europe where sparking water doesn’t come in blue bottles.

v

I found a Tesco, a DM, and Rossmann all within 500m of my hostel. They’re exactly the same as they are back home but also different: nothing is in English. Still you can navigate the place. Something like 90% of communication is subliminal and it’s true: you know exactly what you’re looking for as soon as you find it. More generally places that look the same everywhere serve a purpose.

To become disoriented, first you have to be oriented.

Those chic hotels and Instagram styled coffee places do exactly that for the international traveller. They also promise that there is a surface to be punctured. Beyond what you see, there is a there there. They serve as bases to explore, ways to make sense of the place. They are the organising principles of your stay, and it’s a clever marketing ploy. You’ll tell your friends: well there’s a restaurant that serves gorgeous local food, by this coffee shop that does the best cortados…

vi

It’s a good city to sit outside with a glass of lemonade in the evening.

vii

Municipal baths are a thing we should do more of. Other cities are probably disadvantaged in that they don’t have as much natural spring water available, so it won’t be exactly like Budapest, but that’s just the limitations of our imaginations. The thing is, few cities have anywhere to go that doesn’t involve spending money, and fewer have places dedicated to relaxation. And in Budapest’s baths, everyone relaxes. Omas and Opas and their sciatica can do water gymnastics in heated pools; teens can relax in the sun together; old men can play chess and relax. It’s a place for a wide slice of society, there’s none of the segmentation and hence segmentation that goes on with modern places, where nice places are reserved for those who are willing to pay and the poor get what’s left over.

viii

The city was modelled on Paris, so it is very beautiful. but unlike Paris the architecture is varied, so you don’t become dead to what you’re seeing. There is always something lovely for your eye to rest on.

Everything is built to five stories here, and it’s gorgeous. Ignore anyone who says that anything over 3 stories is too dense. Five stories is a perfect height for city living.

ix

The city is very green, which means it feels smaller than it actually is. The trees make walking in the streets bearable in late spring and summer.

I was walking through town to meet M___ for dinner, heading towards a park close to the restaurant. I had maps off and was just vibing. I came across not one but two nice places to sit and let life flow past on my way: so much so that I sat for ten, twenty minutes each time before checking how far I had to go and realising that I wasn’t where I wanted to be. When I got there that park was somehow even more lovely than I hoped.

x

There’s an entire cafe devoted to a guy whose philosophy I despise. what was heartening was that behind the counter was a woman with the bisexual haircut and a sleeve tattoo. nobody in the cafe seemed to pay the philosophy of Roger scruton any heed. which warmed the cockles of my heart

xi

Like everywhere else in Central Europe, Budapest does fabulous coffee and cake. It’s best to find a traditional place (it’ll have lots of wood and heavy furnishings), but they do the comfiest coffees. a Mélange is especially nice: it’s a tall coffee with milk and honey. Perfect for a mid afternoon bite.

Buda and Pest feel like different places, different universes, even though what separates them is just the Danube. Pest is bustling and commercial, whilst Buda is quiet and residential. Buda has separate apartments with large balconies, or gardens looking down onto the city below. Apartments in Pest are in quiet buildings just off the street. The buildings have winding staircases and chic (but sometimes decaying) decor, like the echo of a once golden age.

xii

I thought I would have to walk through a busy traffic tunnel to get where I wanted to go: from Pest to the castle. instead the world presented me with an alternative: a beautiful and quiet set of up steps.

xiii

The baths are popular because the weather is tough. In winter it’s Far Too Cold and so the thermal baths are a relief. When I came in Jan 2018 steam would rise off the outdoor swimming pools. In summer it’s nice to relax in the cooler indoor pools away from the sun.

Szechenyi baths is where all the pretty people go. To show off themselves.

Rudas is earthier. Days are segregated by gender, so check before you go. They make you wear this sort of shift to cover your genitals. Otherwise you are 100% naked. So you end up in a room full of ancient thermal baths relaxing with a hundred naked men. It’s probably one of the top three homoerotic experiences I’ve had. And I’ve had gay sex.

xiv

It’s important to get out really early and really late when you visit a new city. They have different energies about them. After 3am and before 7am. Perhaps do both on the same night. What could have been a party city will have turned itself respectable and neat. Budapest doesn’t have the greatest nightlife: you go elsewhere for that. Berlin or Prague. Comparative advantage. But the mornings are glorious. Quiet and cool. The sun is out but not blazing, there’s no danger of getting burnt. Plenty of runners and cyclists. For some reason there is always traffic in Budapest. Lots of traffic, always lots of traffic. With cars that drive too fast for the narrow streets.